09 Nov a challenge helps with a growth mindset
A Challenge HELPS WITH A growth mindset
I can’t think of one single day where I did not come across a challenging moment. And, I’m actually grateful for such challenging moments. Gee I learned a lot. I learned that a challenge helps with a growth mindset. I’m sure parents, in fact adults in general would agree with me here. So if you are wide eyed and curious, read on to see how you can feel excited about learning what I am about to teach you. All I ask is that you be prepared to be flexible with your thinking. Adopt a growth mindset. This is when you are open to learning and even excited about new perspectives.
WHAT TYPE OF EXPERT ARE YOU?
Life is full of challenges from the moment we are born. Infact challenges seem to last the entire life span. Is that a scary thought? Don’t let it be. Challenges are the best opportunity for you to become your own expert in how you deal with things. Wow, did you ever think you can become your own expert? There is an expert in all of us. You can be an expert in throwing tantrums, an expert in listening, an expert in creating playlists, and the list in endless. Just remember, you get good at what you practice.
AND THERE WAS HANNAH! she helped turn my challenge into a growth mindset!
Let me tell you one of my personal stories, When I was first teaching in an early learning centre, I was in my early 20’s, I remember a little girl called Hannah. I was fresh out of University. I will never forget this child. She was amazing in so many ways. She treated us like family and we treated her like family. There was this one particular day. All of a sudden my lack of social and emotional skills, was immediately brought to my attention.
Hannah ran up to me screaming and crying with her arms up ready for the cuddle that I did not give her. Sorry Hannah! In my panic, I turned to my sister and said, “What do I do?” And so my sister gave me the simple instruction of “get down and give her a cuddle”.
Why did I not know to do this?
A challenge helps with a growth mindset.
I did not know that I was meant to do this! Or did I, and was it that it was just not natural for me to do that? What skill was I missing? It was uncomfortable but I did it. I thank Hannah for teaching me 50 amazing things during that moment.
I had images, thoughts, feelings and so much happening at the one time, it was amazing. From that day on, I allowed the children to teach me more. They were clearly the experts in their own worlds, and I was so grateful for what they were teaching me.
KEEP LEARNING: allow challenges to help your growth mindset
I never stopped learning, I had a growth mindset at work each and every day. I was still learning from the children who surrounded me, different backgrounds, different personalities, all so unique. They were great teachers. I believe that teachers, parents and other adults who don’t allow themselves to learn from kids and teens really miss out.
Think about it…we as adults look back at our photos of when we were 5 or 10, even 15 or 20, and we are so different to that time. Well doesn’t this prove that we no longer think like a child who is 8 or 10? If you want to learn about how they think or feel, and why they behave certain ways, you best ask, and observe them.
So what exactly is a challenge?
A challenge is something that puts you to the test. And there are plenty of these… we can be challenged with worry, anger, stress, relationships, sadness and much more. I had a challenge not so long ago. I was saddened by my fathers passing. He was unwell and I knew I had sad times ahead. But I am grateful that some of my skills came out to help my journey.
My skills helped me deal with and then move away from sadness in a slow and steady pace. I first noticed this skill when I lost my dog Douni a few years ago. Douni became so unwell. I still miss him. My dad and Douni visit my thoughts often, and I love it.
If you can relate to this or if you would like to better prepare yourself for any kind of sad moments, even being saddened by leaving old friends behind in your old school, then I can teach you simple skills to move away from sadness in the healthiest way possible.
Q: So what is it that a challenge tests?
A: Our way of coping.
Now let me tell you, we all cope differently. I’m pretty good at coping with challenging moments with worry. For example I help myself make a decision to determine if something’s worth worrying about or not.
I remember worrying about a doctors visit for days and days. Then I learned that I didn’t need to worry because it was “useless” to worry about the visit. I also remember allowing myself to worry about some upcoming assessments.
I didn’t mind this because this type of worry made me prepare for them. So do you see, it’s all about how you allow yourself to see things. If you need help seeing things differently, don’t worry, you can learn lots of “reframing” skills.
I will help you discover the expert within you, just the way I did. And now that I am comfortable with “challenges” I live a very comfortable life full of skills to cope. And most of the time I can add some fun to these challenges.
A challenge helps with a growth mindset. I even make some of my own creative coping skills. This works real well when you hear unkind words or have unkind thoughts. You can always throw some humour into this type of challenge to help with the way you deal with it.
I have been able to discover my own coping skills and so I believe that each of you can be able to discover your own unique potential to use coping skills that suit you.
You can learn how to deal with every day challenges, and you will also realise that they are not as bad as what your thoughts can make them to be. Some thoughts, you won’t even need to pay attention to. Let’s be honest, have you ever had thoughts that have turned out to be wrong?
I have. I once thought someone was ignoring me, but they actually could not hear me. So I then started thinking that they did not like me, or want to socialise with me and so on. But I was wrong to even make such assumptions. I have learned to do less assuming these days. I can teach you how not to pay so much attention to thoughts that are not useful or correct. Sounds cool right?
No matter what the challenge, you can definitely deal with it. To be real, you may never be free of all challenges, but you wont be afraid of them. Sometimes strange feelings creep up inside me. They confuse me, but I have learned how to acknowledge them, and accept them and still carry on.
Positive Living Skills has a great blog on improving mental strength